PACT Therapy and How It Can Improve Your Relationship
PACT stands for Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy. It’s a form of couples counselling that uses a body-based approach to address the root causes of stress and conflict in a relationship.
When couples fight, they often fixate on who’s right and who’s wrong. Instead of delving into that, PACT focuses on the inner workings of your body, emotions, and brain during a fight.
During the session, your therapist will simulate problematic experiences in your relationship, and in the midst of the argument, point out what's happening with your body and emotions. Your tone might have changed, you might have a big frown across your face or your arms crossed. There is a great deal of emotion there that is clamoring to be heard and understood.
Through PACT therapy, each partner will see and hear each other more clearly. So much of your frustration can go away when you feel seen and understood!
Here are some of the principles that define the PACT method:
Everybody wants to experience affection and compassion. We desire to feel valued in our relationship, we want to feel safe and special. With the help of your therapist, you’ll discover how to establish a bonded connection. Couples in such a relationship are able to understand each other’s thoughts and feelings better, react to each other's distress and attempts at intimacy, and look out for one another.
During an argument or difficult situation, sometimes we overreact. We get caught up in an immediate, instinctual emotional response, and we might do or say things that we later regret. All of that makes it very difficult for us to comprehend and empathize with one another. The therapist will assist you in controlling your emotions so that you remain in a controllable range and can genuinely communicate with one another
We typically react to cues from our partner in a quick, involuntary manner because being connected to them is so important to us. Examples include adjusting our tone or subtly growing more distant. Most of the time, we don't even realize we're doing it, yet our partner is still significantly impacted. A major step toward a closer, more fulfilling relationship is learning to recognize your instinctive reactions and what they mean for you and your partner.
PACT and the “couple bubble”
The couple bubble refers to the environment where trust and security reside and is formed in the relationship. It’s made up of the couple's common understandings, shared expectations for the union, and joint coping mechanisms.
Cultivating a “couple bubble” helps maintain a safe and secure ecosystem that keeps intruding, destructive elements away.
How to create your own couple bubble:
- Make your relationship a priority
- Understand your partner’s triggers and attachment style
- Develop and cultivate shared habits or rituals
- Have your partner’s back
- Look into each other’s eyes
- Take time for your personal well-being
If you think you might benefit from PACT Couples Therapy, Rinat Perlman is available Monday through Saturday at Central Wellness. Join her waitlist by contacting our reception today. Free 15-min Consultation call is available - click HERE to book online.